I'll let you go by, 

because this, this is it. 

This is goodbye. 

I will make mistakes and I will hurt some people. - maybe a lot of people. And i'll throw away some friendships and fight for some others. Going away and coming back full circle is part of life and this most important thing is that I will learn some hard lessons.

Give me strenght to know what's right, give me strenght to keep going and trying.

Recently,

How do I explain my need to break away from you?

We're friends, yes. 

Nine years, yes. 

Share similar friends, yes. 

But that was for all these years. What about now? The present? I think I can't relate anymore. You have other people, and we're just not -- not on the same level? 

What if we're still the same people but our lives are different. How can that work? How can you be my "best friend" if nothing's there anymore. I don't tell you about half my life. And I have no clue about yours. 

I think that this is weak. You fight for the ones you cherish. You fight tooth and nail and you fight dirty. But what if what we've been holding on to all this while doesn't exist anymore and our friendship is just stitched together with memories. 

Do I leave now with the memories? You and me - laughing constantly - flea days - bubbletea treats- dirty jokes - walking in the middle of the dark field, yammering on about everything? What about your secrets? Where do I place them? And what about mine? Where do they go? 

Or should I fight till we're both raw and gone? When all that remains of our time is red haze. And pain. Because you don't let friends go without slicing of a little bit of yourself.  

You're so good at indifference and I'm amazing at running away. 

Just give me a reason

Just a little bit's enough. 

Just a second, we're not broken, just bent.

hell if i know. hell if i don't. 

I remember you.

I remember you. So strong and you knew the world. everything. you knew the world.

What's left of you? Shattered bits  & pieces- stitched together by empty bits of hopes and promises.

i'm tired of always trying. I dont know why it's so tough to keep going but fuck it is.


I knew you were trouble - now playing

Childhood Memories: Cartoons Edition

Well, I Ship. . .

Arthur & Francine

Buster & DW

Sue Ellen & Binky

George & Fern

Midnight regrets.

Hello there again,

This has become a place for me to vent. A place away from logic and "proper emotions" and from people. This has become my place.

I'm bad company sometimes, on my mind is what I'd be doing if I were alone. Yes, that means that I'm alone most of the times - but the funny thing is, you can feel alone in a room full of people. Even if everyone in the room is your friend. Things like that happen and I've accepted that. When I'm alone, in my room or the lib or anywhere else, my imagination runs wild. Scenes that would never in a million years happen play in my head, and in my head - I am who I want to be. A person with an exciting future.

I'm probably just feeling moopy now.

I saw a video somewhere that said that - oh shit, I forgot. Hold on a min, I'm gonna tumblr to find the screenshot.


****

oh fuck that, I can't find it basically  it was like

" What made life so exciting when we were young was that we all had hope. We could be whatever we wanted to be.We could be a doctor, a lawyer, a badass rockstar or a dentist. But as we grew up, we had to make choices. And with every choice we make, what we could be, the number of things we could be, shirks.

Then came poly, where we had to choose. One industry, one line, one life. the ultimate choice.

But fact is (I'm just bottom-lining here) there are so much other things to look forward to in life and it's not all work. I hope. Anyway, it's not what you do that matters, it's who you do it with.

Make friends, make lovers, make stories and legends. "

Wednesday

Somethings are better not said.

Late night games of Bubble Blasters

Life's like a game of Bubble Blaster.
Sometimes, life, like the crazy squirrel, hands you the easiest balls, and sometimes you get the worst.
And sometimes, your shots are one in the million and others are . . .less than good.

Sometimes you get to change the game around and others, you end way too soon because of an error or two you made.

Because life's like that. Life's a crazy squirrel.